No More Heroes...

Who are your heroes? Are they the same as they were when you were younger, or have you outgrown them? I've been pondering this myself for a while, since Michael Jackson died. Not that Jackson was ever a hero of mine...

What is a hero? To me, a hero is a person who exhibits qualities that puts them above others in any field, be it sports, music, art or writing. When I was younger I had a few heroes, people that I respected, who I felt had a talent that lifted them up to the highest heights, who became, for want of a better phrase, gods. Sadly, I now feel that most of those people have let me down.

Let's get down to specifics. Sixteen years ago, I wrote a list of "The Gods":

1. George Lucas
2. Jean Michel Jarre
3. Jim Henson
4. Green Gartside (from Scritti Politti)
5. Jim Aparo
6. Alan Grant
7. Gene Roddenberry
8. Nik Kershaw
9. Arthur C. Clarke

(Looking back, I would probably add Terry Pratchett and Madonna to that list, but didn't at the time. Poor old Nik Kershaw has "demi-God" in brackets after his name, so he wasn't obviously totally in favour at the time.)

Anyway, looking at that list now, would I still consider them heroes? By that tag, I mean that they are still as important to me as they were then, that they haven't put a creative step wrong, that they are still, well, Gods, and not mere... people. It's harsh, but there you go.

So, 1. George Lucas. Well, it was all going so well until 1999, wasn't it? His position in the pantheon looked assured, the Special Editions of the Star Wars trilogy could be seen as an indulgence, rather than a mis-step, but then Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace came out. The fall to mortality wasn't immediate, but the creeping feeling grew that the halo had slipped... (See I Blame Rick McCallum for more details!) Mortal.

2. Jean Michel Jarre.  In 1992, one of my favourite Jarre albums, Chronologie had come out.  In 1993 I went to see him at Wembley Stadium and I thought his reputation had been sealed, but in the intervening years, he's produced few albums of such magnificence, but has been reworking his old stuff, making little "art" albums and then the appalingly bad Téo & Téa "dance" album.  I blame the fact tha he's not married to Charlotte Rampling anymore.  The woman must have been a good influence which he's now sadly missing... Mortal (though fingers crossed for the future!)

3. Jim Henson.  Untouchable.  His sad and untimely death in 1990 meant that he could no longer prove himself fallible. (Unfortunately his death proved his mortality though...) The body of work created by him in his lifetime stands firm.  His legacy, and the future worth of the Henson Organization remains to be seen. Hero.

4. Green Gartside. Just when I thought nothing would ever be heard again from Mr. Gartside, in 2006, he pulled out his best album since Cupid & Psyche '85 in the form of White Bread Black Beer, a self-produced, minimalist album of pure loveliness. Hero.

5. Jim Aparo and 6. Alan Grant. Look, I was a big comics fan in the 1990s, especially a Batman fan, so this classic artist and writer duo got included. Still like their work, but haven't read a comic in anger for nearly a decade, so I can't really say if they're still heroes. Probably. Though I'd have to veer towards Frank Miller and Alan Moore for their work on The Dark Knight Returns and The Killing Joke respectively.

7. Gene Roddenberry. The man had a vision and a commitment to get Star Trek made and to keep it going in the '80s and '90s with Star Trek: The Next Generation. His death in 1991 didn't stop the franchise, and his legacy, as proved by the huge success of J.J. Abrams' big screen reboot Star Trek this year. Hero.

8. Nik Kershaw. OK, so he's not as big a star as he was in 1984, but Mr. Kershaw keeps putting out songs of wit and intelligence on his own label, making albums such as 2001's To Be Frank and 2006's You've Got To Laugh. Hero, just for doing what he does.

9. Arthur C. Clarke. The greatest Science-Fiction writer ever. Prescient and talented and just a fantastic writer. Hero.

And Terry Pratchett.  His writing gets better and better all the time, despite a dip in the Soul Music/Hogfather years and unfortunately his Alzheimer's will probably get him before he gets a chance to make the fall from grace. Still a hero. Always a hero.

Madonna. The only woman on the list, but unfortunately now very much a mortal. Like Jackson, her heyday is well past now, but no one seems to have told her. She keeps churning out the same sub-R&B drivel, but people still seem to like it. So maybe it's just me, but she hasn't done anything good since 1998's Ray of Light (and actually, looking at the sales figures, a lot less people like it...). Mortal.

So, there you go. Most of my heroes are only still my heroes because they're dead. If I had to write such a list now, I'd definitely include Joss Whedon for his work on Buffy, Firefly/Serenity, Dr Horrible and Dollhouse and for being a funny, horribly talented genius. I'd also include John Lasseter and all the team at Pixar for neverfailing to entertain and amaze.

Funny, but all my heroes come from the creative world. No sports people and no politicians. Hmmm....

Friday Night Blog: Star Trek

And so the future begins again.... J.J. Abrams, the man who brought us Lost and Cloverfield and Alias gets his hands on Paramount's crown jewels, and delivers a new Star Trek, not exactly for a new generation, as he's rebooted the original Kirk and Spock series, rather than creating a new crew.

In a time-twisting plotline that rewrites history, Abrams effectively wipes Starfleet's future history, from the moment his protagonist, the Romulan Nero, arrives from the future (around Picard's time), destroys the USS Kelvin, and kills the father of the still-being-born Jim Kirk. The future of Star Trek - all the films, The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine and Voyager all now exist down another leg of the trousers of time. The only thing that remains intact is the future Spock (who also travelled back to try to stop Nero) and the prequel series Enterprise.

Got that? Good.

So is it any good? Well by rebooting the series that means we have to have new actors playing the iconic roles. This is tricky, because the actors have to give us the essence of the characters, without sinking into parody.

Karl Urban gives us a brilliant McCoy, all gruff and grumpy and sarcastic, Chris Pine actually manages to feel like Kirk, while avoiding Shatner's stilted delivery, and Zachary Quinto gives a brilliant performance as Spock, once you can get over the fact that he's not still playing Sylar from Heroes. You half expect him to raise a finger to Kirk's forehead and start slicing....

The other crew members remain much as they were, generally character-less, except they all seem to be geniuses at something or other. For example, Anton Yelchin's Chekov (with his over-the-top accent - Walter Koenig's was dodgy, but this is just too much) is suddenly a transporter expert, being able to lock onto fast-falling objects. The usual Trek genius, Scotty (played by Simon Pegg with his tongue firmly in his cheek) doesn't appear until the last third of the film, so I suppose they had to find someone to fill his shoes for that scene. Uhura is the only character to have more of a developed character than she ever did in the original series, acting as a surprise love-interest for a major character.... And Zoë Saldana isn't exactly ugly, either!

There are enough nods to the original series to keep the fans happy, enough differences to make their blood boil, and probably enough to keep the non-Trekkie entertained too. The film looks brilliant, from the Enterprise's new iBridge (I like the idea that the viewscreen is also a window now, rather than just the old screen), to the more realistic, down-and-dirty engineering section, all pipes and water and steam. Looks like Abrams been watching his Firefly...!

I liked the film, but I didn't love it, but then I've never really been a fan of the original series (more of a Next Gen boy). I felt the plot, although emotionally engaging, was a little slight, and I'm pretty much sick to death of time-travel shenanigans in Star Trek, which I'd hoped we'd left behind. I'm sure there'll be more films to come, and this is a likeable, fun version of the crew to go on new voyages with.

Friday-Night Blog: I Blame Rick McCallum...

So, I was watching Star Wars: The Clone Wars (the 3D animated series) yesterday, which seems to be showing on Cartoon Network here in the UK, after having been isolated to Sky Movies before, and I thought it was quite good, which got me to thinking... Where did it all go wrong for the Star Wars saga?

I used to love Star Wars - no, actually that's an understatement. I used to eat, drink and breathe Star Wars. I used to watch my VHS copies of the Trilogy on an old black and white TV in my room, snatching a few minutes of Jedi while I got ready for school in the morning. I used to read and re-read all the books I had, and hunt for old second-hand copies of annuals and storybooks - this was in the dark times, before the coming of the second merchandising wave, when there was, frankly, sod all new Star Wars around!

And then, Dark Horse Comics published Star Wars: Dark Empire, in 1991; Timothy Zahn's novel Heir to the Empire was published in 1992, and the ball started rolling again. More books, more comics... And my Star Wars reflex kicked in! I bought nearly everything I could that had the Star Wars name on it, spending all my available money on it. Everything was fantastic in the Star Wars Universe. Us fan boys were happy, very happy. And then...

And then, George Lucas announced that he would be making Episodes I to III of the series, and we would get the full story - we'd see Anakin Skywalker's fall from grace, his voyage to the dark side, Obi-Wan Kenobi fighting in the Clone Wars... The anticipation was immense. And before that, we'd get new, spanky, souped-up versions of the Original Trilogy IN THE CINEMA!

And that's where I think the rot set in. George Lucas had the chance to go back and "tinker" with our beloved films. Don't get me wrong, I like most of the changes made in the films - the attack on the Death Star needed sprucing up, Cloud City's windows do open up the landscape, and the um, well, no actually most of the changes in Return of the Jedi were totally unnecessary (and they got worse when Hayden Christensen was dropped into the film on the DVD...) Most importantly, GREEDO DID NOT SHOOT FIRST.... ahem.

To help with all the work on the Special Editions, and the Prequel Trilogy, Lucas enlisted Rick McCallum, who had worked with the Great Beard on the Young Indiana Jones series. Alarm bells should have rung then, quite frankly...

And so, in 1999, we got Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace. God we wanted to love that film. I watched it two and a half times (fell asleep watching it on my stag-night...). I didn't mind Jar-Jar, Jake Lloyd as young Anakin was OK, Darth Maul was pretty cool with his double-blade lightsaber, Liam Neeson was solid and Ewan McGregor was over-keen as young Obi-Wan, but there was something a bit, well, hollow in the whole enterprise. It had Star Wars on the label, but it felt like something else was on the till.

Three years later we got Episode II - Attack of the Clones and we also got the afore-mentioned Christensen. Well, to say he was wooden would be insulting to trees, but he just didn't fill the role of the nascent Dark Lord of the Sith. He was just a whiney brat who apparently didn't like sand. The romance between Anakin and Padmé was risible, and you got the feeling the Natalie Portman was trying her best, but couldn't muster up the enthusiasm to deal with her love interest...

And then, in 2005, we finally got to see Anakin become Vader. Possibly the strongest film of the prequels (save for the fact that Portman seemed to have died inside somewhere - probably when she saw her script), it still lacked... soul. We knew we should be feeling something, we knew we should love these film like we loved the original films, and we've tried to convince ourselves to love them over the last four years, but we really can't....

Where are the heroes? What kid wants to be Anakin or Obi-Wan or Padmé, like we wanted to be Luke or Han or Leia? In what way were any of the ships cooler than the Millennium Falcon or the X-Wings (or TIE Fighters, come to that?) Even Yoda's gymnastics were a little bit, well, silly, if you think about it. The over-reliance on CGI for the special effects already looks dated in some cases, whereas the model work from the Original Trilogy still stands the test of time.

So why do I blame Rick McCallum? Well, I don't think the man had the cojones to say no to George Lucas. I believe that every artist needs an editor, a critic or an executive to stand up to them and tell them when something just isn't good enough. Prince hasn't really made a consistently decent album since he parted company with Warners as he's been allowed to indulge himself - even such celebrated writes as T.S. Eliot had editors to send them back to the drawing board. I believe that Lucas needed that, and Rick McCallum wasn't the man for the job.

I've given up on the majority of Star Wars products these days. There are too many books (I gave up after the New Jedi Order series), comics and video games to buy. I'm looking forward to the live-action series due to arrive in the next few years, because I'm an optimist. I hope I get to see more of the Clone Wars TV show, but it seems to be a bit random at the moment.

I still love Star Wars, I really do. I just wish the Prequels had been so much better.

Friday-Night Blog: Star Trek

And so, the great barrel of ideas gets scraped once more, as the big screen reprise/remake/reimagining/regurgitate of Star Trek heads towards our cinema screens this spring. The idea around this version is that we get to go back to before the original TV series to see how Kirk and Spock meet, and their first mission in the Enterprise.

Now, as you might imagine, this kind of reboot has got a lot of people hot under the collar, and yes, I'm talking about the geeks here. They've got all sorts of issues with the movie, ranging from the fact that the Enterprise wasn't built on Earth, much less in a field on Iowa, that Chekov didn't join the crew until the second season....

I couldn't care less really (although why would a spaceship that doesn't have to cope with gravity be built on a planet?) My biggest issue is with the whole time-travel plot that is rumoured to be an integral part of the film. From what I can gather, the old Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) has some interaction with a younger version of himself (probably played by Heroes own mr Nice Guy Sylar, Zachary Quinto), which alters history. Now if this means that every version of Star Trek is wiped from history, then OK, that's fine, we can deal with that (especially if that means Voyager never happened...)

My concern is that this means that Kirk didn't get sucked into the Nexus (as in Star Trek: Generations) and so didn't get killed by Malcolm McDowell, and so we have to put up with even more Shatner-antics as Kirk. Although, he's not in the new film, so hopefully we'll be spared...

Friday-Night Blog: Hmmm.

Well, I've got myself into this mess, now I'd better think of something to write. I could go on about the final episode of Battlestar Galactica and how it totally rocked, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about how frakkin' awesome it was, but that would risk alienating everyone who doesn't give a toss... All I can say is I hope the people who make Lost watched it and were making notes of how to not suck. We can but hope...

So, what shall I write about? I made some granola today. Yep. That's exciting and sure to get everyone commenting in their droves. Actually, it's become a bit weird now that I know people are reading this - I don't know if that means I've changed the way I write, or what I write, but it's strange to think that I'm not just blogging to the wall, so to speak. It's nice that people are reading it, but also a little bit scary.

Would quite like to see Monsters vs. Aliens. Looks almost as good as a Pixar movie, and quite funny. It'd be good to see it in 3D, but that would involve a trip to the Big Smoke (which I'd like, but at about £15 for a train ticket these days, it'd work out at quite pricey trip.

Sorry, but that's all I've got at the moment. I'll try and do better for next week. If you're watching on Facebook, please become a fan. Thank you.

Friday-Night Blog: Watchmen

So, yep, this blog's late... No change there then, but at least I do have a valid excuse. Last night I went to see Watchmen, so that's where I was, and that's why the Friday-Night Blog is coming at you on a Saturday!

Well, I've been sitting here trying to write a clever, informative review, but it's not working. If you want that sort of thing, then go read Empire's or SFX's review, 'cos they're better at that than me! Besides, I'm trying to catch up on Heroes at the same time, so I'm a bit distracted.

The cut-to-the-chase version is that I liked it. It worked for me as a film, probably because I read the graphic novel nearly 20 years ago (I'm old!), and I'm not a huge fan (I always preferred Frank Miller's Batman: The Dark Knight Returns) It's a long film, weighing in at two and a half hours, but it fairly bounces along. There's a lot of violence and a heck of a lot of gore, which is why the film gets its 18 certificate. And Malin Ackerman's Silk Spectre (Ieft) challenges Michelle Pfieffer's Catwoman as the comic-book geeks' fantasy fetish female... Some of the CGI work left me a little cold, as if I know it's all going to date very quickly, especially Dr Manhattan and his giant clockwork fortress. What's wrong with painting a guy blue and then making him glow? Ah well...

I'm sure I could think of other more enlightened things to say, but they ain't happening now! Go and see the film if you like your comic-book movies dark and gritty and violent!

Not much else has been going on this week. Back at work after a week's holiday, but I've got myself a new Assistant Manager, so come April, I'll be able to go out at lunchtime again! Still loving Battlestar, and enjoying reading Susan Winemaker's Concertina: The Life and Loves of a Dominatrix - lots of kinky sex and food, which seems good to me! I'm also liking the pure unadulterated geekiness at Topless Robot.

So that's it, that's my week!

Gatchaman!

I am soooo excited about this. Once upon a time there was a Japanese animation called Science Ninja Team Gatchaman about 5 super-powered teenagers. Some Americans saw this, and hacked it about a bit (cutting out most of the violence and the sexual imagery and sticking in badly animated bits concerning an R2-D2 rip-off and his flying dog...) and called it Battle of the Planets, the kids show from the late '70s we all know and love. (It was also retooled into G-Force, and Eagle Riders, but that's another kettle of fish.)

Anyway, Imagi, the company behind the recent CGI Turtles movie, have been working away at a new, CGI version of Gatchaman, and here's the trailer. Don't blink, or you'll miss it. (BTW, that's Joe (Jason in BOTP)'s car, and then we glide up to see the Phoenix. Yum.)

On Imagi's website, you can also see some production shots, including one of Jun (Princess)'s booted legs and her yo-yo. No. that's not a euphemism.



If you want to learn more about the whole history of Gatchaman then get over to Home of the White Shadow for all you ever wanted to know. And boy, there's a lot...!

RIP Stan Winston - Effects God

BBC NEWS | Entertainment | Film special effects pioneer dies: "Oscar-winning special effects expert Stan Winston, who created the creatures in films including Aliens and Jurassic Park, has died at the age of 62.
Winston, who also made the robots in Terminator, died at home in California surrounded by family on Sunday.
The film veteran had been battling multiple myeloma, a plasma cell cancer, for seven years, a representative of the Stan Winston Studio said.
He had worked with Steven Spielberg, James Cameron and Tim Burton.
During his 40-year career, he became a pioneer of merging real-world effects with computer imaging.
California governor and former Terminator star Arnold Schwarzenegger said: 'The entertainment industry has lost a genius, and I lost one of my best friends.
'Stan's work and four Oscars speak for themselves and will live on forever.
'What will live forever in my heart is the way that Stan loved everyone and treated each of his friends like they were family.'
Winston won Oscars for his work on Aliens, Terminator 2: Judgment Day and Jurassic Park.
He also received Oscar nominations for Batman Returns, Edward Scissorhands, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, AI, Predator and Heartbeeps."

Rest in Peace, Stan, you were a legend, and I thank you for bringing so much wonder into my life.

Indiana Jones and The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull

Yes, I finally went to the cinema again! I think the last time I went was probably to see Casino Royale, so it's been a while...

Went to see the new Indiana Jones movie - can't be arsed to type all that again - and it was... okay. I thought some of the fight and, ahem, tomb raiding sections were fun, but I did think that the whole crystal skull malarkey was a bit ridiculous. Was it me, or did the Russian bad-lady (played just this side of evil Bond-villain by Cate Blanchett) already have an alien skull, and said there were two more in Russia already? In that case, why were there already twelve skulls in the temple/spaceship at the end? (Probably should have put a spoiler warning on this..) And what the hell actually happened at the end? (Well, I know, but, what the hell?)

Still, Harrison Ford was back on form as Indy (although he's aged gracefully, he can't quite manage as much action as he used to...) and the scenes he had with Shia La Beouf (silly name...) and Karen Allen (back as Marion Ravenwood) were fantastic. It was quite obvious that they're setting it all up so that Mutt (Shia) can take over his father's mantle (oops...)

It was nice to have Indy back, but it would have been nicer to have given him a better story. (Do things stop being magnetic just because they're in a sack?)

Batman Begins Again

SFX - The Dark Knight is go: "Nolan will indeed direct the follow-up, The Dark Knight and Christian Bale is once again slipping into the Bat suit.

This time around - as predicted at the end of Begins - he'll be facing off against the maniacal Joker. And Brokeback Mountain's Heath Ledger is the man in the frame."

Good news indeed. Thank god both Nolan and Bale have recommitted to the project - it would have been a pity to have to change once again! Cool title too. Thanks God it wasn't the same as my headline!

Review: Superman Returns

And so, after an eternity in Development Hell, the Man of Steel finally flies back onto the big screen. Nineteen years after the execrable Superman IV: The Quest For Peace, Bryan Singer manages to restore the reputation of the Last Son of Krypton in much the same way as Christopher Nolan did for Batman last year.

Singer sticks closely to Richard Donner's highly iconic and influential original movie, keeping much of John Williams' emotive score and even the style of the opening credits (also nicked for the credits for the new Doctor Who series...). The film, intended as a direct sequel to the first two movies, takes place some five years after Superman leaves Earth to search for the shattered remains of his home world. He returns (see where they got the name from?) to find that the world has moved on. Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth) has a new fiancé and a son and is about to be awarded a Pulitzer Prize for an story about why humanity no loger needs a Superman.

Meanwhile, Lex Luthor (played by a wonderfully scene-stealing Kevin Spacey) has evaded prison because Superman didn't turn up for a parole hearing and has swindled a dying woman out of her estate so that he can discover the source of the Man of Steel's power and knowledge.

Brandon Routh proves to be an excellent choice in the twin roles of Superman/Clark Kent. He echoes Christopher Reeve's bumbling Clark persona, but also manages to make Superman his own. He's friendly but slightly aloof, charming and yet distant - almost alien. Much of the film's emotional core comes from his feelings of loneliness, and his feelings for Lois.

If Donner's film showed us that we could believe a man could fly, this time we believe he can fly, catch falling jet aircraft and stop gas explosions with his icy breath. The effects are excellent, and in some ways very subtle - the haze surrounding Superman's heat vision, the flames of re-entry into atmosphere, the sonic boom as he flies off at top speed. Mainly we revel in the pure joy of seeing someone fly, much in the same way we enjoy the sight of Spidey swinging through New York.

Unfortunately, it's also Singer's insistence on sticking closely to the original movie that lets it down in some ways. twenty-eight years on(!) we demand more pace from our superhero movies, with a bar of quality set by two Spider-Man films, at least three Batmans and even Singer's own pair of X-Men. Those films show that you can have emotion, have slow moments and still deliver a cracking, well-paced action movie. Superman Returns seems to have its beats in the wrong places and the story seems to fizzle out, ending not with a bang, but a whimper. There's no rousing emotional climax, no real sense of threat to the world from which only Superman can save us.

Hopefully, this won't be the last we'll see of Superman on the big screen, but any further films will have to stand on their own, rather than riding the nostalgic coat-tails of the 1978 epic. Does the world need a Superman? Probably not, but its still rather wonderful to have him around.

Superman Returns UK Website

New Star Trek Movie Teaser Poster

Big screen retro-Trek, anyone? Anyone? Hello, is there anyone there? Oh, come on, it's not like it's big screen Voyager, or anything.... Hello?

StarTrek.com

Oh lordy: "Is the new Superman meant to be Jesus?"

BBC NEWS | Magazine | Is the new Superman meant to be Jesus?: "Is the Superman Returns movie meant to remind us of the Bible? And if so, is it blasphemy?
Well here's the story.

An all-powerful father sends his son to Earth to save mankind by showing them the 'light'. The son is able to perform miracles. He 'dies' and is born again.
Sound familiar? It might do, it's the plot of the new movie Superman Returns. And in the blogs and internet forums there has been a maelstrom of debate on the parallels between Superman and Jesus Christ.

Superman has a long history of Judaeo-Christian symbols, but this time the film's makers have taken it to a new level.

- At one point Superman falls towards the Earth in a pose that vaguely echoes the Crucifixion.
- He is stabbed in his side with Kryptonite in an echo of the stabbing of Jesus by a Roman soldier.
- A female nurse rushes into the hospital room to find it empty just as Jesus tomb was found to be empty by female followers.

And there are Christians in the US who believe that the symbolism is now sufficiently obvious that the film can be incorporated into religious teaching."

Well, I suppose you could read it in that way, but hey, it's just a story.... Stretching it all a bit far, methinks!

We're on the ball...

So, nearly 4 months after this site found out about Catwoman Copycat, SFX have printed a news article about it in the latest issue (Christmas 2005). Sheesh, get with the program, guys! ;)

SFX

Stop and Smell the Serenity

OK, this is a Priority One Directive. This weekend, you have to go and see Joss Whedon's new film, Serenity. You don't have to have seen the original Firefly series (but why haven't you? You can get the DVDs for about £13 if you shop around - you really won't regret it), you just have to be ready to see the best science-fiction film this year.

Did Revenge of the Sith leave you cold? War of the Worlds leave you unimpressed? Well, Serenity will make you laugh, cry, cheer and clench just about every muscle in your body.

If you liked Buffy or Angel, then you yourself a huge favour and go and give Joss Whedon's baby all the love and attention it deserves. Not many cancelled shows get to be made into a movie, but then Serenity is different.

Go and see it. You can't stop the signal...

Serenity

Catwoman "Copycat"

Just stumbled across this site for a fan film. Okay it may not be official (or even much cop) but it looks a damn site better than the Halle Berry atrocity. For a start, they've got the costume right! Catwoman 'Copycat'

You can see loads of other pictures and download a short teaser trailer - even to your mobile or PSP if you're feeling flash. My, she is flexible...!

Review: Batman Begins

Thank god! The ghosts of Joel Schumacher's travesties can finally be laid to rest, and even Tim Burton has been blown out of the BatCave. Sing hallelujah! They've finally managed to do a decent, nay, brilliant Batman film!

Christopher Nolan has got the tone, the cast and the whole goddamn feel of the thing absolutely spot-on. Christian Bale makes both a dark, brooding and driven Bruce Wayne, and a well cool Dark Knight, both at the same time (well, not exactly at the same time, but you know what I mean...) Heck, everything was right. It was dark and brutal and there wasn't a single sight of a day-glo Batarang or bat-credit card.

And the support cast did exactly what they were supposed to do. Liam Neeson, Michael Caine and Gary Oldman (as a textbook study of Jim Gordon) were all fantastic, and actually acting their socks off, as opposed to chewing the scenery at every opportunity. And that's not even mentioning the new Batmobile...

The best thing was that it all made sense. It was never explained before how Bruce Wayne managed to accrue all these gadgets, without arousing suspicion (even if that means ordering 10,000 bat-ears from China). But this film lays it all out, logically and sensibly.

The first in a proposed trilogy, Batman Begins feels like three films in one itself. The story keeps building and building, from Bruce Wayne's training in the far east, to the creation of Batman in Gotham, to the finale, and the set up to the next film, and the treat of a villain who leaves a certain playing card at the scene of his crimes... Bring It On!

The Star Wars Marathon!

11.02 - Here we go, kids, the first back-to-back viewing of the classic Star Wars trilogy. I'll keep you posted as we go!

13.04 - A New Hope So Far... Just a small change, but they've finally changed the English writing on the Tractor Beam control panel for the Aurebesh script seen in the rest of the series. A small thing, but it'd been bugging me for a while! The shot of the Landspeeder entering Mos Eisley may have been changed too - it looks a bit less wooden than before!

The major thing is the quality of the picture - good contrast and colours. Ooh, they've sorted out Ben's lightsaber too - looks like both his and Darth's have been re-animated to look brighter and cleaner. Wahey!

13.20 - One Down... Well, that's A New Hope finished. Like I said, no major changes, just a nice clean version, with only one example of matt lines visible. Onwards to the best of the Trilogy...!

14.40 - New Empire Scene... Well, I'd heard the rumours that they were going to drop Ian McDiarmid as the Emperor into Empire, but they've also changed the dialogue somewhat, with the Emperor revealing that it was "the offspring of Anakin Skywalker" who destroyed the Death Star. Vader is unsure how this could be, telling us that he didn't know he had any kids, but the Emperor tells him to "search his feelings"....

A nice little scene to tie things together a bit more, and it adds to the continuity to have McDiarmid reprising his role as the Empereor, as he wasn't in the original version of Empire. And he's sooo evil!

15.10 - Boba's Got A New Voice! Boba Fett's voice has changed! Sounds a lot like Temuera Morrison's voice to me...!

15.52 - Empire Still Rules... Yep, The Empire Strikes Back is still the best of the series. One small thing - the end credits still have Clive Revill as the Voice of the Emperor, even though he's been replaced, and the copyright message only says 1980, 1997, and not 2004 like A New Hope... Has someone made a mistake and not updated them?

Just Jedi to go now...!

16.21 - Jabba's Lost His Subtitles...! I don't know if this is intentional, or an error, but Jabba's lost his subtitles! Most of the time it's not necessary (probably because I know the film inside out), but there are a few times when the Illustrious One's wit and humour are lost to the casual viewer.

Or I may have turned them off somehow.

Ooh, I never noticed Dengar in the palace before...

19.33 - The End of the Saga... Well, that's it, game over! For the most part, Jedi was unchanged, save for the addition of Naboo into the victory celebrations, and dropping Hayden Christiansen in at the end (with his Battle of the Planets haircut...)

So all in all the DVDs are pretty well done. I would have preferred the original versions on there as well as the Special Editions, and perhaps 2 disc sets for each film, with all the original '70s and '80s documentaries, but I'm sure that'll come out in another few years or so...

Shrek 2

Went to see Shrek 2 yesterday. Pretty good - not as funny or as groundbreaking as the first, but still worth the money. No, probably not worth the money, as it costs so bloody much to go to the cinema these days. I remember going to the Odeon in Swansea for only £1.95 in my student days. (Bloody uncomfortable though, especially if you were in the second screen, where the seats all seemed to be at an angle to the screen...)

£13 for two tickets! I ask you! Still, I'll be doing it again in a couple of weeks, when Spider-Man 2 comes out. Not sure about Thunderbirds, though. The 'birds themselves look bloody good (even though TB2 has got a lardy arse), and I'm not sure about a flying FAB1 that isn't even a Rolls-Royce, but why did they have to get children involved? I know Alan Tracy was annoying in the original series, but did they have to make him an annoying child?

And what's Private Hudson doing in charge of International Rescue? "That's it man, game over. It's game over! What the fuck are we going to do now? Launch Thunderbird fucking One?!?"

The Clock Is Ticking...

Yep, the countdown has started. Well, it could have started at any point, but, well... Look, the new Star Wars film comes out in exactly one year. It has been confirmed that Episode III will be released on May 19th, 2005. What it's going to be called is another question. The papers were all full of it being called "Birth of the Empire", but then the official Star Wars website www.starwars.com "accidentally" said it would be called "The Creeping Fear", but then it was April 1st.

Anyway, I'm excited. This will be the BIG one, the one where it all kicks off - the big Anakin/Obi-Wan showdown, the death of Padmé, the birth of Luke and Leia (though obviously not in that order...), and the moment we've all been waiting for, the moment when Anakin becomes Vader. I personally hope it's the last scene of the film - just imagine Vader's theme thundering out in glorious Dolby Digital, the sound of his breathing, and the first shot of that cool helmet.

Um, that sounded a bit crap (and a little bit suspect...) You know what I mean. I hope.

Just as long as they don't balls it all up with too much CGI and some crappy slapstick moments... You know who you are, Jar-Jar Binks... Don't make us come down there....

Until then, though, we've got to all be content (heck, ecstatic) with the release of the Classic Trilogy on DVD on September 20th. Finally we'll be able to see A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi in glorious, pin-sharp DVD-ovision! Of course, these will be the Special Editions released a few years back, as George Lucas has decided these are the "correct" versions of the films. I personally think they should have released them in dual-format, like they have done with the Alien Quadrilogy, so you can decide which version you want to watch. On the plus side, there are rumours that the nasty CGI Jabba in A New Hope has been replaced with the smoother version from The Phantom Menace, and that Ian McDiarmid has re-recorded the Emperor's scene in Empire, just to keep things nice and contiguous.

Review: "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace"

Yes, having somehow lost the clumsy Episode I moniker, Star Wars: The Phantom Menace has made it onto our video shelves. Now, those of you that know me will think you already know what I think of the film, but the truth is, I've changed my mind!

You see, when it came out, there was all the hoo-hah and hype, and it was all a bit disappointing really. Sure, it was Star Wars, there were all the familiar things: lightsabers, droids, space battles, the Force, but it seemed to lack something. Some harsher critics have said that it could do with a plot, or characters that you could care for, but I feel that was way too strong. Yes, this is a slower, weaker, start than a Star Destroyer thundering overhead, but this is the start of a six-part story. There must be room for development within the story in order for us to get to Episode IV. (When will they start calling it Star Wars: A New Hope, then?)

Anyway, I saw it again on video, six months after I last saw it at the cinema - and I've warmed to it. I've managed to get over my prejudices and enjoy the film for what it is - a hugely enjoyable romp in the Star Wars galaxy. (I can't believe I just used the word romp....) Yes, Jar Jar is annoying, but not really as bad as everyone really thinks - after all he is the first really comic character in the story, so I think we can forgive him.

So, yes, go get the video - pause it to see the ETs in the senate chamber, ignore some of the rougher CGI work (none of it as bad as Special Edition Jabba, thank God!) and just have a damn good time waiting for Episode II!